It's been 2 years now since I started Wear 'n Share. I look back in amazement at all that has happened in the last 2 years and how much this charity has grown and how many lives have been touched through it. I never dreamed it would grow to be this big, but somehow I knew it was my calling. I'm often asked why I started Wear 'n Share. It's quite a personal story, and I usually only share part of the story which is the idea of it. I had been sitting in my children's pediatrician's office and I had read an article about a teacher who had kids who couldn't attend her school because their parents couldn't afford shoes. And I thought if these kids don't stay in school how will they ever have a chance of breaking the cycle of poverty they are living in? Then I thought about my own kids and all their outgrown shoes and clothing just sitting in boxes in our basement, but I didn't know how to get them directly into the hands of these families who need them. And surely their are other mothers like myself. I need to find a way to pool our resources and reach these families. Thus, the idea of Wear 'n Share was conceived. But I didn't actually start it until 2 years later. This is the more personal part of the story.
When I speak of "a calling", it's an innate feeling that we are meant to do something bigger than ourselves. I had always felt even since I was a young child that I was on a mission of some kind. I know it sounds kind of crazy. My dad used to call it "faith", but as a little girl who didn't go to church at the time, faith was a foreign language to me. Although I do remember sitting in front of the TV on Sundays every once in awhile watching local church broadcasts trying to figure out what faith was, longing for answers and maybe a closer relationship with God, but not understanding why or how.
Time passed, the little girl grew up and had children of her own, I found my faith and God, but still had this indescribable calling I couldn't understand. Until a monumental time in my life when my second and last child was going to be going to kindergarten. I had been a stay-at-home mom for 8 years and devoted this time to raising my children. Both my "babies" were going to be leaving the nest and suddenly I had to figure out who I was again. I had not worked in 8 years, was 40-something, still wanted to be home when my kids got home from school, and wanted my summers off. Who wouldn't want to hire me?! Not to mention, I had lost my identity. My children had been my whole world for the last 8 years and somewhere along the way, I lost myself. I didn't even know what I liked to do anymore or what I was good at besides being a mom. I became very depressed. It was the darkest period of my life.
We went to visit my Dad and step mom in Iowa. They live on a horse ranch. Going there is about as close to heaven on earth as I can get. Life just seems to slow down and you are one with the land, the animals, nature, and family. It seemed the perfect place for me to find my way out of the darkness. While there, I decided to go on a run/hike through the country. Midway through, I knelt to the ground and cried and prayed as if my life depended on it and begged God to show me the way, just to tell me how to find my way out of the darkness and back to the light again. I had not realized until that moment that I had been completely shutting God out of my life until then. I don't know if I blamed him for my sorrow, or if I was ashamed that I wasn't appreciating all the good in my life and taking it for granted. Either way, this was the first time in a long time I had reached out to Him for strength, guidance and direction. All I knew was that at that moment, I felt completely and utterly hopeless and I needed Him more than I ever had before.
When I returned and was taking my shoes off from my run my husband said, "Maybe you should think about giving this charity idea of yours a try". And there was my message from God. He didn't waste any time! Obviously He knew how impatient I could be. Almost instantly my mind started swimming with ideas, I met with my Pastor just as soon as we got back from our trip, who ironically is now a counselor in the same building Wear 'n Share is in, to determine if this idea was feasible and to bounce some ideas off of him. Then it all just started coming together, and as Wear 'n Share developed, the darkness subsided and there was light again, brighter than ever before. I knew that at last I had found my calling, that sometimes out of the darkest places the brightest lights can shine if you open your heart and let God show you the way.
I haven't shut Him out of my life since then and He continues to guide me on this journey to help families in need. I know that Wear 'n Share is a success through the grace of God. I am constantly amazed at how at every obstacle, with a little prayer, He guides me to find a solution and I know it's because my dreams are not just my own now, but for all the people who are touched by Wear 'n Share.
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